When things are a little (or a lot) rocky in your relationship, don't call your significant other 21 times in a single day. Especially if they aren't answering your calls. Especially especially if it is actually impossible for them to accept your phone call from a payphone in a correctional facility on their cellphone, and you are aware of this fact. It only makes the receiver of phone calls annoyed and angry and their cell phone battery die, and (I'm assuming) makes you single minded, obsessed, and crazy with listening to a ring over and over again and unable to calm down or get your mind off the troubles you can do nothing about from your concrete cell across the country (and that you have really caused yourself by being a selfish asshole that refuses to accept any responsibility, and continues to blame all your problems on the recipient of 21 phone calls in one day despite the fact that they hadn't even met you yet when you fucked up enough to cause current incarceration. and that said recipient stuck by you, even when faced with a year sentence.).
My life is more hilarious than ever. And this dating disaster story, I think, trumps all of my others.
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